From afar

[solrosan]

Notes: Did this just to try the post-function. Yes, yes I 'm still that insecure when it comes to use communities. The story was first written in Swedish, for fun, and then translated to English when I was forced to write a short story in high school (about 4 000 years ago). I think it sounds ridiculous because neither of the characters speak English really...I just think there is one that even KNEW English. Wasn't really working in Swedish either since most of the conversation is in French. But my French isn't better than Google Translate, so I wasn't going to try (and 4 000 years ago, there was no such thing).

Background and Summary: In 1784 the King of Sweden, Gustav III, came to Versailles, France, to establish a relationship with Louis XVI and France. With him was, among others, Axel von Fersen – count, diplomat and ladies man. Axel, though Swede as he was, was a part of Queen Marie Antoinette’s inner circle and he visited the French court more often than he did the Swedish.

This takes place during the first week of the Swedish stay at Versailles. Axel finds himself frustrated and annoyed by the overpopulation of Swedes and the charade of stiff etiquette and real politics he has to endure during the formal visit when all he wants to do is have carefree days in the Queen’s company.

***

Axel was standing by a window on the second floor at Petit Trianon, looking out over the garden while the world slowly came back to life. It was grey outside and he couldn’t tell where the sky started and the earth ended. The morning fog was so thick that he could hardly see the trees closest to the house.

The Queen turned in the bed and he looked at her over his shoulder. Her sleep had been troubled tonight and it was probably why he hadn’t woken her up yet. Now her sleep seemed calm and the light from the window fell upon her naked breasts. Axel himself had put on his shirt, but it was still unbuttoned.

Since her sleep had been bad he couldn’t bring himself to wake her up, even though he wanted to. Instead he just walked over to the bed and crawled up beside her. Standing on his knees he watched her sleep, so calmly, so peacefully. Wonder if she was dreaming, and what her dream was about…

He didn’t know why they had ended up in this bedroom tonight, but this bed was just as soft as the one in her bedroom (and in every other room for that matter) so it didn’t make any difference. They hadn’t made love tonight, just been lying in each other’s arms. A long time ago she had thought him the beauty of closeness and the passion that could come only from really intimacy. With her, he would be happy just to lay there, listen to her breath…He would not need anything else…or well…he grinned to himself.

Next to the bed lay their wigs and their clothes. The people they were to others. Here in the bed were they only a man and a woman, not a Swedish count and the Queen of France.

In the end he couldn’t keep himself from touching her and with a gentle hand he brushed away some hair from her face. So soft, so beautiful…it was such a shame to hide it under a wig all the time. On the other hand, the wig made the sight of her hair so much more precious because so few people were allowed to see it.

Axel kissed her forehead and wished that she would wake up like Sleeping Beauty, but she kept on sleeping with a smile on her face and he let her. Instead he got out of bed again and finished getting dressed. The clock on the wall was late and soon enough her workday would start (his too for that matter). There were things in this world that he just couldn’t control or influence, for example everything surrounding the Queen.

When the wig also was on its place and the buttons on the shirt was turned the right way he got up from the small table in front of the mirror and left the room after leaving a note on the pillow where he had slept before. The note said: The most beautiful thing I know is to watch you sleep, that was why I didn’t wake you to say good bye. I see you around My Dove. It was not signed, but he had no doubt that she would know who wrote it anyway.

He ran the first part from Petit Trianon and then slowed down until he was just walking fast and kept that pace until he reached the main castle. Discreetly, and by relatively unknown paths, he found his way back to the floor where the Swedish escort was lodged. So far, so good, but now he had to face the problem of wearing the same clothes as he did at the party yesterday. What should he do about that? He looked down at himself and stretched the jacket some, well the clothes was not that wrinkled anyway. Wonder if he would have the time to go back to the room where he was supposed to sleep and change? He found a clock and reckoned that time wouldn’t be the problem, it was more the “not getting noticed sneaking back in the room”-part that could be tricky. But…well, he didn’t have the same rumour surrounding him at the Swedish court as he did at the French…No, in Sweden it was Master Munck who had the honour to be called the queen’s lover.

He had been worrying for nothing. The man he shared the room with was still sleeping, snoring. It was not the same pleasant sight as the one of the sleeping Queen, but Axel was still happy that the man was asleep. With a sigh and a small shook of the head Axel turned his back to the man and not long after that his clothes were folded on the bed and the wig placed beside them. He looked into the mirror and rubbed his eyes, it didn’t look as if he had gotten much sleep tonight. Which was the truth but he would still prefer if it didn’t show. Late nights and a lot of parties was nothing that should affect this Swedish count. He was unstoppable! Just like old days. When did he grow up and become old? Rolling his eyes, he left the mirror, washed his face and wished that he would have time to take a bath, but that was impossible. Ah well, at least he hadn’t had sex tonight.

When the man he was sharing the room with woke up was Axel already buttoning his shirt again. Why, why could they not get their own rooms at the castle? Had anyone seen how huge this place was? Well, it did not bother him that much since he did not sleep here anyway.

“By all the cursed cherubs in the garden! Are you up already?” the man, who apparently thought the sunlight was burning his eyes, muttered when he saw Axel.

Aaaah…the sound of a hung-over Swede in the morning! Axel put all his focus on the buttons so that he didn’t have to answer.

“When did you come back to night? I didn’t hear you…” his roommate claimed and put his legs over the side of the bed. He placed his hands on his head and cursed loudly.

“Here you go Fredrik,” Axel handed him a glass of water and finished the buttoning of the shirt. He let the other question go unanswered too and placed himself in front of the mirror to arrange the wig properly again. After tying a blue ribbon in the neck he put it on and his dark hair disappeared from the world for the second time this morning.

“What’sthetime?” Fredrik wondered when Axel took his jacket and thought about how he best would cower up the dark marks under the eyes. On the other hand…if he compared himself to the rest of the Swedes he didn’t look that bad. Not if they all looked like his roommate anyway. It wasn’t without contempt he watched Fredrik’s stumbling way to the bathroom table.

“Almost nine,” Axel answered just as he left to go the king’s room and see if the king needed assistance this morning. He prayed that he wouldn’t need to babysit the whole Swedish delegation yet again today. It was more than enough with the two previous days. But what did you not sacrifice for your king and country? From time to time even a count had to work for his privileges.

Like the good, and quite uninterested, cavalier he was, Axel stopped outside the king’s door without presenting himself in any way. Instead he placed himself in front of the window and watched how the fog slowly lifted and the sun started to warm the world. Why did he go up this early? Sure, the French King and Queen would soon be ready to eat breakfast in front of the court, but the audience was not until a few hours later. Gustav would most certainly be able to get dressed with the help of all the errand boys he had brought…or were their title ambassadors? Axel could never remember that. On the other hand, if he wouldn’t be here, where would he linger then?

He killed a yawn behind his hand and saw how the Queen’s wagon approached the castle and he watched a little more careful to see if he might spot a glimpse of her. No, well, it would come, all in good time. He smiled and yawned again. This wouldn’t do, he shook his head and stood up straight.

Two of the men that Axel almost considered as friends at the Swedish court came wandering down the hallway for no other reason than to join Axel in his wait outside the door. Good, it was so much nicer to play well-mannered when you had company. Both the men seemed very surprised to see Axel standing there waiting for them. Axel could with satisfaction see that the both of them looked more tired than him.

“My God Fersen! How can you look so awake?” one of them wondered and Axel smiled, if they only knew that he had spent an hour already just watching Marie-Antoinette’s naked breasts.

“Practice make perfect gentlemen,” he claimed with a smile, “You’re not going to ruin the French belief that Swedes drink alcohol like water and that we let our children go directly from the breast to the bottle, are you?”

He was not very happy with this version of himself and his countrymen, but on the other hand, there was something proud and patriotic in him and if people told him that he could do things just because he was Swedish then he couldn’t step down from the challenge. Who was he to disappoint the French? Strangely enough he had found that he actually was a better drinker than most of the French and he was quite pleased with that. Apparently, he was better than many of the Swedes too, but off course, maybe it was routine too? Now a day he knew how to drink so it would look like he drank a lot the whole night without actually getting drunk. Where the beauty in that lay he couldn’t say, but you don’t pick your skills, you just profound them.

The other Swedes laughed at the prejudices and even though Axel asked a lot of questions about his friends adventures during the night, he hardly said anything about his own whereabouts. This was not hard though since the other men gladly bragged about the night’s conquers.

“I don’t understand how you can be up already,” one of the men told Axel after finishing a story about how he had spent the night with one of the Queen’s ladies-in-waiting, “You were still dancing when I left.”

“Yes, but I didn’t have the pleasure of any of Her Majesty’s friend tonight, therefore I could sleep,” Axel grinned. If they only knew…

“Are you trying to tell us that you spent the night alone? You Fersen?” the other man seemed every sceptical, but at the same time mocking. So, the great ladies man Fersen did not get any last night?

“Not at all,” Axel played hurt, “I share my room with Fredrik.” And that was neither a lie nor bragging. No, how could anyone ever brag about spending the night with the man that he was forced to share his room with. After enduring some more mocking and after the arrival of one more gentleman to the group of waiting cavaliers outside the Swedish king’s room, the doors finally opened and the four of them entered the room. So did yet another day of work begin.

***

Axel was amused by seeing Gustav so excited to be at Versailles. Sure, the Swedish king pretended that he was not affected by it, so did everyone that came to the castle, but it showed. The ones that had been here for a long time or many times before, they saw, they understood and they smiled among each other in a mutual understanding.
Today the French king held yet another audience for the Swedish escort and its king and since it was the third day in a row it started to become a bit boring if you asked Axel, but God no, who asked him? But he had to admit that they did look kind of handsome when they walked in their pre-decided order, everyone dressed in the official costume of the Swedish court that Gustav himself had designed, well, everyone except Gustav that was. They looked something like an over-dressed, future football-team. It was a sign of belonging and unity, even though Axel didn’t feel (and didn’t want to feel) like he belonged in the group.

They all stopped when Gustav did, they bowed for the Royal Couple after that Gustav had done it and after that they just stood there, hats in hands, and listened when the kings exchanged polite fraises and discussed today’s schedule. God, life as a king must be so boring! Axel was glad that he didn’t have such duties.

All men in Gustav’s group were toy soldiers. They all had titles and orders and God knows what, many of them did, just like Axel, own their own military companies all over Europe, but when it came down to it they were all just spoiled brats. They were the ones that would take the hardest fall when Gustav made his reformations; they were the ones that would rise against his son. It was a good thing that no one could see the future; if someone could then maybe Gustav would have been killed now, in this hall, instead of years later at the Opera.

Since none of them were real soldiers they didn’t have the discipline that came with the profession. Instead they had the cavalier’s eyes for intrigues. Axel had, just as the others, trouble with just standing there and listens to when Gustav politely tried to help Louis get to the point. The count’s brown eyes went to the Queen who sat beside the King. Maybe she looked a little bit tired and, as the rest, bored? Wonder for how long she slept after that he had left her? Did she find his note? No one else would think that the Queen looked tired, no one else noticed. But he did.

Then she looked at him and he smiled at her. The kings were to busy to notice how the count lit up when he and the Queen looked at each other and how serious he became when he looked away. Soon enough his eye were back at the Queen though and he thought about her breasts, lying naked in the early morning light. Maybe she could read his mind, because for no apparent reason she blushed behind her fan and then he decided to stop looking at her. He shouldn’t tease; it was no time for that now.

***

Despite the cavaliers’ stories, this was a business trip and nothing else and even though the Swedish king himself were having the time of his life the main purpose was still for Sweden to apply for financial aid from the superpower France. Axel thought it was humiliating to see Gustav crawl before Louis. Especial when he knew both of them privately and knew that Gustav was the greater man. He guessed that it was at times like these that upbringing was so important because no one pretended to see how Louis stuttered and fumbled with his papers while Gustav radiated clam and dignity. Everyone saw it, but everyone pretended that they didn’t. If it had not been such a natural part of his life Axel would most certain be fascinated by it, but now he just felt ashamed on the behalf of both kings.

There were exactly as many men from France as men from Sweden in the room, the same with kings and all other titles. This was important. Axel was seated as the second man on Gustav’s right side and from time to time he actually listened to what they were discussing. He did however have full focus on what happened in the room, what papers that they showed and signed, the body languages of everyone in the room and so on. He read what he was supposed to read and had opinions where it was expected of him. Truth be told, when it came to questions like these (how much money Sweden would borrow from France and so on) he didn’t have an opinion nor did he have the right to one; but why would he care, he would be in France all the time anyway.

He thought about the Queen instead, the reason he wanted to spend all his time in France. This was indirectly the reason that he didn’t have a better position at the Swedish court. It’s hard to be noticed by your own king when you spend most of your time trying not to be noticed by another.

Now, when he was bored out of his mind, it was impossible for him not to linger at the thought of the Queen’s breasts…those perfect breast in the morning light. How soft and tousled the hair had been…Wonder if Campan had managed to sort it out properly or if they had just placed the wig on top? He couldn’t help that he smiled a little. He looked at Louis and wondered, as most of the times when they were together without the Queen, if he knew what his wife was doing? Did he know that his precious wife used to scream out the name of a Swedish count during the nights? A count that was sitting at this very table, begging for money for his country? If the king knew, then he was just as good an actor as Axel, so it was most likely that he didn’t know.

Someone said his name and brought him back to here and now. It was Gustav himself who spoke to him and Axel leaned forward to be able to hear the king better. It was so silly actually that they spoke French with each other when it was obvious that it was just a discussion between the two of them, but Axel guessed that it was the polite thing to do. Otherwise the French might think that they were misleading them (which they were).

“Certificate?” Axel blinked once and thought about the situation for two seconds before answering “Constatation”. It was his greatest achievement this morning and he wasn’t impressed by it. He wasn’t here to be an interpreter even though that was what they were using him for. Well, he had had worse missions, but he was of the opinion that Gustav should just stick to the words he knew. Because if Gustav didn’t know them it was a great chance that Louis didn’t either.
The morning’s excuse for negotiations ended with that France would increase the financial support to Sweden to help with the building of the smaller cities infrastructure. It was a good thing that Louis had intelligent men by his side, otherwise Gustav might just as well convinced him to sign Versailles over to Sweden…if Gustav dared to think such a thought that was.

***

Good God, what a boring day!

It was hard to amuse Axel, even though his schedule was planed from early morning until late night, he still found time to be terribly bored. It was another of his profound skills.

For lunch the ladies of the court had planed a picnic in the garden. It was the latest thing at the French court; it felt so picturesque and bohemian. Axel wasn’t impressed by it any more. The charm of novelty was dead since long ago and now he just wondered when the rest of them would figure that out. The weather wasn’t even that great today, but it had to be pouring rain for the ladies to take the meal inside. Because the air was still warm and it smelled of grass and flowers. Just like in the poems that had been read earlier.

Axel’s friends at the French court, which was the same at the Queen’s inner circle, laughed at him. He wasn’t paranoid; he knew this was the case. They thought that it was hysterically funny that all the Swedes were dressed the same. Not to mention that the style of their clothes hadn’t been in fashion for three month. The fact that all Swedes were standing together in one group didn’t help either. Spoiled brats! Axel was surprised by his own though and took an other glass of champagne.

Gustav on the other hand seemed to be happily unaware of this fact where he was standing beside the French Queen. While Axel half-by-half participated in a conversation with Louis’ foreign minister (who never had left France by the way), count de Nivernais (who no one really knew what he did at Versailles at the moment, besides Lady de Rigaud) and Evert Taube he more often than seldom threw an eye at his king and queen. That was actually how he had come to see them, Gustav was his king even though he spent most of his time in France and Marie-Antoinette was his queen in body and soul. It was kind of weird to see them together and see how well they got along. Like a child of a divorce who suddenly realised that his parents had started to spend time with each other again.

Wonder what they were talking about and why she smiled the way she did? He became warm inside when he saw her smile and his eyes lingered when she laughed. If anyone was watching it was so obvious that he was in love, but there weren’t that many people who looked at him today. No, today he disappeared among all the other Swedes who wore the same outfit. That was why he allowed himself to watch her for a little longer, up until when she looked at him and their eyes met. He smiled with self-confident and winked at her. It amused him to see her blush and looked the other way. Unfortunately it also resulted in her taking the king’s arm and leading him away to a place where Axel couldn’t see them. Typical.

Still a bit amused, but also irritated at himself, he returned to the conversation that he was pretending to be a part of. Even though he didn’t see her anymore it was impossible not to hear her laughter when Gustav most likely told one of his jokes. Axel got a bitter taste in his mouth that he tried to wash down with more wine.

What could he do to entertain himself? Maybe he should go and bicker with d’Artois? Just the thought of that made him smirk and excused himself from the other gentlemen, even though he didn’t planed of actually approaching d’Artois. No he just strolled of to the place where the pick-nick-table still was set. He took one of the crackers with shrimps and looked around among all the well-dressed people that walked around with a partner by their side. It was funny that none of the couples were husband and wife. More then half of them were “secret” lovers, but nothing was a secret (or sacred) at Versailles if you walked around arm in arm during an official pick-nick. That was why it was Gustav and not him that walked with the Queen. Because no one knew their truth, and no one was to find out their truth either. Except Sophie. Which meant that Fabian probably knew as well. And Taube, though Taube Axel had told himself. That was actually really annoying; it was called secrets because you weren’t supposed to tell people. But since Taube had confessed that he was sleeping with Sophie, then Axel could just as well tell him that he spent most of his nights in the bed with Marie-Antoinette.

Speaking of the Queen, their eyes happened to met again. Or, happened and happened…their eyes had a habit of finding each other across large crowds of people and wide dance floors. Axel smiled again and this time he approached the international royal couple.

“Excuse me Your Majesties,” he bowed, “but it is my meaning to intrude. Your Majesty,” he turned to Gustav and didn’t seem to notice the Queen anymore, but he noticed every little movement she made from the corner of his eye, “I was just going to point out that we maybe should withdraw to look through everything before the meeting this afternoon since there is a lot depending on…” instead of inserting a name he just rolled his eyes and had no doubt that the king would understand exactly who he meant and continued on as if he had never stopped talking, “and because of that it can be preferable if the rest of us knew it as well. But I do understand if You prefer to stay here with Her Highness, the most beautiful of Europe’s women,” he gave the Queen a polite smile, he was an expert on empty flattering, “because in that case I’m sure that me, Taube and de la Gardie can look it over by ourselves.”

Axel was almost as good at crawling for the authority as he was at sprinkle compliments around him. He had been doing it for so many years now that he was as fluent in it. Probably even more so than he was in German or English – maybe even Swedish? The trick was to have the right pitch in the voice and then speak in the right speed. If you spoke to slowly the person you were talking to would think that you though he was an idiot and if you spoke to fast he would think that you were trying to hide something. But as long as you got it right, you could almost ask the person for whatever you wanted without him getting insulted.

At the moment Axel didn’t want anything else than getting an excuse to break up the two royalties and get a chance to stand so close to the Queen that he could figure out what perfume she was wearing (the one de Polignac leant her); but the king thought his suggestion was a good idea so after just a few seconds he marched up to Taube to give him new directives. Axel had to remember to apologize to his friend later.
So, all of a sudden was he left alone with the Queen and he smiled at her and said in a voice that the people closest around them could hear it:

“I’m deeply sorry for taking your company away Your Majesty and that we are forced to leave Your pick-nick so early, but what can you do when you are a trained monkey in matching costumes?”

He winked and leaned in closer so that he could whisper so only she could hear. He also took the time to place his and on her hip, something he had become very good at hiding with his own body.

“And I just can’t stop undressing you with my eyes and it feels so uncomfortable to see you walk around in the nude next to my king,” he backed away with a smirk and winked once again just as the king came back with five of the trained monkeys in matching costumes and the seven men walked back to the castle. If it would have been something that gentlemen would have done, then Axel would have gotten a serious beating by his colleagues after this.

***

The afternoon meeting was just as boring as the one this morning. The fact that he had spent two hours preparing for it just to be able to tell the Queen that he thought about her naked didn’t make it more interesting. Even though it had been worth it just to see her blush like that.

The thought of that made him suffer through the meeting with a smile on his face. The actually thought of her naked helped a lot too, of course. He was a bit ashamed of himself, but just a little bit. He defended his thoughts with the fact that they hadn’t had sex to night. If they had he wouldn’t be thinking about it so much. Or maybe he just would have thought about that instead? He looked at Louis, wonder how often he thought about his wife naked? Most like way too seldom. That was the reason Axel was needed. Maybe he ought to write a thank-you note to Louis? Haha! That would be something…Wonder if Gustav thought about the Queen naked? Not Sofia-Magdalena, no not her, but Axel’s queen. Yes, of course Axel had noticed how the Swedish king looked at her, but all men looked at the Austrian like that. She was so beautiful that he couldn’t blame them for fantasising about what was hidden under all those skirts.

“Excuse me?”

Someone had called his name and he had no idea what they were talking about any more. Embarrassing. He looked at Gustav for some help, but instead he just got a kick under the table form Taube. Nice, thanks, that is what friends are for. He felt as if he was a teenager again and came hung over to his philosophy lectures. The problem this time was just that he had been philosophising a little bit too much.

“Do our countries politics bore you, Count Fersen?”

Axel blinked once; sure as hell it bored him. What did he care about what Sweden traded for the fabrics that Gustav wanted? But when the man sitting on Louis’ right side asked him (who was that man by the way?) he couldn’t answer truthfully.

“Of course not, I was just thinking if it was possible to transport some bears, or at least some wolves and lynxes, to be used as quarry during the kings hunts in exchange for…for…the thing that my king wants at the moment.”
Well, that was almost as nice a save as when he had been woken by a pointer that was walloped in the desk in front of him and answered that Fabian did exist even though he did not think. The result that time had been a hit on the fingers with the pointer, this time the result became a room full of laughing ministers, but he could live with that. Mostly because he had seen a hopeful sparkle in Louis’ eyes when he had made the suggestion.

During the rest of the meeting no one asked Axel anything, but he was completely present. Not to mention how many times he had to push away the thought of Marie-Antoinette’s corset.

***

The Queen was the hostess for tonight’s dinner. Of course at Trianon. Grand, not Petit, they were too many for that. They sat under a portable pavilion. Axel had the lovely duchess de Polignac to the table and the Queen’s friend was a delight as usual. She was good for a man’s ego since the giggled at almost everything when she had had something to drink. The later it became the more water Axel used to dilute her wine with. But he was glad to do it, she was way to kind to have to suffer headache and agony tomorrow and Axel was a good dinner partner. He knew how to take care of a lady and make his dinner partner to feel special, but that was a skill that was not limited to a dinner. Tonight he was extra skilful when not even the fact that he had the Queen on his other side seemed to distract him from his duty and forget the duchess.

The Queen had the Swedish king to the table (by her own choice of course) and that might also be one reason why Axel didn’t approach her more than the etiquette asked of him. On the other hand…it wasn’t Gustav’s hand which lay upon the Queen’s thigh from the entrée until the desert.

Obviously, Axel had no idea how the hand landed there, but he was opportunist and as the courses went by, he carefully and methodical pulled up the Queen’s skirts, one by one. It was a bit tricky since it became a lot of fabric and because he had to entertain Gabrielle and talk to the other ladies and gentlemen around the table at the same time. Not to mention that he couldn’t let what his was doing disturb the Queen so that she couldn’t make small talk with Gustav and the others. But this was not his first time…

She didn’t stop him and didn’t take away his hand even though every layer he removed made him come closer and closer to her leg. Why did women have all these layers? What could be the use? Even though he thought it was beautiful to watch them in their dresses when they danced in the great halls, in moments like these they were just an obstacle between him and his goal! Axel did get his reward though, when he removed the last skirt and his index finger was able to tickle her knee. He smiled when she got goose bumps and he continued to tease them both like this until it was time for the Swedish court to retire.

It was already the following day and the group of Swedes that walked back to the castle was reduced with almost a third due to the Queen’s flirtatious friends. Cursed by his sense of duty, Axel left Trianon with Gustav and walked the long way back to the castle. The young men and the women who accompanied them laughed and behaved as any drunken people would. Axel got to hear both once and twice that he didn’t have a lady back with him. Even the king thought that this was amusing and proposed that the duchess had dumped him, something that the rest found very funny. The only one who didn’t say anything was Taube, but he had a hard time not to laugh when he met Axel’s eyes and they both though: if they only knew.

***

Axel was back at Trianon just after five o’clock. He was sure that no one had followed him or seen him leave again. Fredrik didn’t sleep in their room either tonight. If some one would see him, he would just say that he needed a walk to sober up.

Gabrielle had told him in which room the Queen was going to sleep tonight and in the black night he walked through the gardens all the way down to Petit Trianon. Luckily for him (or well planed by her), the Queen had chosen a bedroom on the ground floor. On the other hand, he had climbed up on a balcony at the castle before, so he could manage the second floor at Petit Trianon too. He hoped.

He knocked on her window. Three times, then a pause and then four times more. It wasn’t the most advanced code and it wasn’t that many people that knocked on the Queen’s window in the middle of the night, but it was their thing okay? It felt more romantic, more exciting and more forbidden…because it wasn’t forbidden enough?

It didn’t take long before the window opened and then he stretched his arms through it and put them around her waist so that she wouldn’t back away. Then he kissed her, long and carefully since he couldn’t wait another second. The day had been too long anyway. With a light jump he entered the room through the window and closed it behind himself. He saw with delight that she had already taken off her skirts, also the corset and the wig. Now she was standing in front of him again, as a woman and not as the queen of France. The way he loved he.

He hadn’t changed from what he had been wearing at the dinner, but he didn’t wear the court uniform. He was a count of Sweden and he was madly and hopelessly in love with the woman standing in front of him. The whole day he had longed for her and when he had kissed her just seconds ago the longing had grown bigger, if that was even possible. It was a struggle, to see her every day but not be able to touch her the way he wanted to, act the way he wanted to, talk to her the way he wanted to. It was unnatural not to be able to scream out your love for the whole world to know. He kissed her and he loved her. More and more for every minute he was parted from her and even more when he was with her.
He had moved them towards the bed and when they bumped in to it he sat her down on it while he kneeled in front of her and parted her legs. Without any refinement he made her nightgown slide up to her hips and he looked up at her with a grin.

“This is something I decided during the meeting this afternoon,” he caressed the outside of her thighs, “I’m going to make you come until you don’t remember your own name.”

And Axel was not the man to lie to a woman. Not when it came to things like this at least.

***

Axel was standing by a window at Petit Trianon and watched the morning fog as he got dressed. Today he would really need a bath he thought while he buttoned the last buttons of the shirt, but it would work out some how.

The Queen moved in the bed and he looked at her over his shoulder while he stuffed the shirt in the trousers. She had slept better tonight and he was grateful for that, she needed her sleep. He took some credit for her good sleep, even though it had been some more hours before they actually slept. He smiled and walked over to her, brushed some hair from her face and kissed her lips. Tender and softly, as if it had been the most natural thing in the world.

“I’m leaving now,” he whispered when his touch obviously had woken her up, “You don’t have to get up yet…go back to sleep.” He kissed her again and caressed her cheek, “I see you at the audience.”

He gave her yet another kiss before he left the bedroom to once again head up to the castle and the bed in which he was supposed to sleep. It was both a blessing and a curse that Trianon was so far from the castle. Just as the Queen’s residence was to disappear he turned around and saw the house shrouded in the mist. Even though he knew that they would see each other soon again it hurt to leave when he knew that this day too would be filled with duties and that he could not come closer to her then a glance from time to time. But he would endure, if for nothing else so for the mere sound of her laughter.