Short Message Service Vol. IV

[solrosan]

Notes: This is the fourth part the ‘verse where Sherlock and not!Anthea are texting friends since long before Sherlock met John, but they have never spoken to each other. The previous parts can be found here.

Summary: The Great Game told by Sherlock and not!Anthea’s texts.

Acknowledgement: Many thanks to frayedshoelace for being my beta and helping me with the end of this part.

***

Are you all right?

You’re fast.
SH

Your flat blew
up!

Technically the
flat across the
street blew up.
Gas leak.
SH

Are you all right?

I’m fine. Please
tell Mycroft.
SH

You tell him.

No.
SH

-x-

Your brother
is on his way
over.

Just wonderful.
First I almost
get blown up and
now this.
SH

Hush.

How much time
do I have before he
gets here?
SH

I’d say three
minutes.

Why didn’t
you warn me
earlier?
SH

Well, he does
pay me.

Then I know
where your loyalty
lies.
SH

Play nice.

Never.
SH

-x-

Why don’t you
ever stop him?
SH

Indulge him.

Hm, no.
SH

It’s a matter of
national security.

So he said.
SH

He has a point.

He never has
a point.
SH

Please? Pretty
please?

What’s in it
for me?
SH

A knighthood?

Just what I
asked Santa
for.
SH

Cute.

Why do you
want me to do it?
SH

National. Security.

Just keep calm
and carry on.
SH

Your Courage,
Your Cheerfulness,
Your Resolution
Will Bring Us Victory!

So you’re our
propaganda minister
now?
SH

You started it, but
yes.

Tragic.
SH

Come on
Sherlock. I know
you're bored.

I’m not.
SH

You’ve been
texting me
obscene
emoticons every
other minute!

YOU!
SH

What?

YOU sent him
here!
SH

I don’t know
what you’re
talking about.

Terrible woman!
And it’s not even
an interesting case.
SH

I was pressed for
time. Best I could
do.

You made it
up?
SH

I might have
exaggerated the
severity when I
informed your
brother about the
situation.

So no national
security?
SH

It might be.

Does Mycroft
know about this?
SH

I don’t think he
does, he was
happy to get
a reason to go
and make sure
you were all right.

I told you to
tell him I was fine.
SH

I don’t take my
orders from you.
And he didn’t
care what I said.

He should
learn to trust.
SH

He trusts me with
his life, but he
trusts neither of
us with yours.

How sweet of
him.
SH

-x-

You’ll enjoy this:
your brother has
a dental appointment
today.

Ha! He hates
dentists.
SH

I know, thank
you for re-informing
me.

I’ve been spending
too much time with
John. I’ve noticed
I’ve started to
state the obvious.
I’m sorry.
SH

It’s fine. I’ll send
you a picture
from the dentist’s
office later.

I’m forever
in your debt.
SH

I’m going to
save that text.

-x-

You gave
Mycroft John’s
number?
SH

You don’t
respond so I
had to do
something.

You’ve admitted
it was just a case
to entertain me.
SH

I’m not going to
tell your brother
that.

And by the way,
you have John’s
number?
SH

I have the Internet.

Ha! You have
it for your
entertainment.
SH

Can you blame
me? He’s a
doctor in uniform.

So?
SH

You’re so sweet
when you’re
innocent.

Would that
make him more
sexually appealing,
for whatever
reason?
SH

Yes, but your
chromosomes are
still hotter. Don’t
worry.

Pfft. Tell Mycroft
I don’t have time.
I only have five
hours left until
the bomb goes off.
SH

Another one?

Isn’t it
wonderful?
SH

No!

-x-

Root canal?
SH

Yes.

Wonderful!
SH

-x-

Guess who just
walked by.

I do not
guess, but...
John Watson.
SH

Yes, your doing?

Of course. I
wanted to
surprise you.
SH

Thank you,
that was sweet.

He is better
without the cane,
right?
SH

Quite!

You have to
make a move
soon! He spends
far too much
time with Sarah.
SH

Stop playing
matchmaker.

Just trying
to help. You
should really
get a divorce.
SH

I like my job,
Sherlock.

You’d like
John too. Even
though he’s a
bit slow.
SH

He’s leaving
now. Your brother
doesn't look
pleased or
convinced.

John was there
for your sake,
not for his.
SH

Find the plans
please.

Boring. Even
an idiot could
do it. Actually, I
might just let an
idiot do it.
SH

Be nice to the
doctor.

-x-

Does the latest
explosion have
anything to do
with what you’re
doing?

It wasn’t my
fault.
SH

It never is, is it?

No, never. I
won.
SH

Not even going
to ask about that.
To confirm:
we haven’t had
two massive gas
explosions in just
a couple of days?

No. Semtex.
Don’t tell Mycroft.
SH

Good, that’s a lot of
taxpayer money saved
if we don’t need
to investigate. I have
to tell your brother.

Why?
SH

Because someone
is running around
blowing things up
with Semtex.

I’ll handle it.
SH

That’s not very
comforting.

John’s upset
with me because of
the latest
explosion.
SH

How come?

I think he
blames me for
not stopping it.
Or for not caring.
SH

I’d guess the
latter.

Would you be
upset about that?
SH

I’m a finger on
the hand that
sends people to
war.

What does
that mean?
SH

That I know how
to not care about
the means when
it justifies the end.

Thank you.
SH

You’re not a
terrible person.

-x-

I’m brilliant!
SH

Sure you are.

Why do
people care
about
astronomy?

It’s fantastic.

Not you too.
SH

-x-

I was wrong.
SH

What was that?
I’m saving that
text as well.

An idiot couldn’t
find the plans, but
he was pretty close.
SH

Be nice to John.

Just for you.
SH

Hush. So you have
the stick?

Yes, but it’s
empty.
SH

Oops.

You knew?
SH

Maybe. You
shouldn't have
opened it.

I’m not
trustworthy.
SH

I know. Bring
it by tomorrow?

Whatever.
SH

-x-

In which
office is my
dear brother
today?
SH

Coming with
the plans,
are we?

No, sorry. Just
me. Which one?
SH

He only has
one office.

Don’t even.
SH

All right. He’s in
that one though..

See you both
in a bit, then.
SH

We’ll see.

-x-

You looked
tired.
SH

I am a bit.

Don’t let
him work you
too hard.
SH

I never do. It’s
the Chinese
market keeping
me up late.

That was a cute
nickname for John.
SH

Haha. You looked
tense.

I was meeting
Mycroft.
SH

More than usual,
I meant. You all right?

Yes. I just
missed something,
and it bugs me.
SH

I’m sure you’ll
figure it out.

I’m sure too.
SH

Humility suits
you so well.

-x-

Show my brother
my website.
SH

Why?

Just do it. Now.
It’s important.
SH

You’re not
going to tell me?

You’re a clever
girl, you’ll figure
it out.
SH

You’re taking the
plans to a pool?

You know the
stick is empty.
Please, tell
Mycroft!
SH

Why don’t you
do it yourself?

I need the
extra time this
will give me.
Please?
SH

I’m on my way.

I don’t know
what I would do
without you.
You’re my best
friend.
SH

Sherlock Holmes,
are you saying
goodbye to me?

Hopefully not.
I have John’s gun.
SH

Where’s John?

With Sarah.
Sorry. Just
show Mycroft.
I’ll be fine.
SH

You’d better!

-x-

Are you all right?

Sherlock?

Answer me! Your
brother left
without me!

[Message undeliverable]

Sherlock!

[Message undeliverable]

Don’t force me
to call you!

[Message undeliverable]

Please….

[Message undeliverable]

-x-

(Bonus material - Completely Jossed)

Vol. V